Stages of Change in Weight Loss: How Women Over 40 Can Break Free from Old Habits

The weight loss game changes when we hit midlife. What worked for us in our 20s and 30s just doesn’t cut it anymore. That whole cycle of calorie restriction, endless cardio, and chasing the latest diet trend? It’s not working in our 40s and beyond, my friends. If you’ve been stuck in a cycle of relying on carbs for comfort, skipping your workouts, and indulging in too many sweets or processed foods, it may be time to rethink your approach.

Instead of beating yourself up, let’s talk about progress—recognizing where you are and taking small, actionable steps. One powerful way to break free from the old habits that aren’t serving you is by understanding the Transtheoretical Model, also known as the Stages of Change. This isn’t about quick fixes or instant results—it’s about honoring your body and creating lasting changes.

Stage 1: Precontemplation – “Who, Me? Change?”

In this stage, change isn’t even on your radar. You might feel frustrated with your weight, energy levels, or how your clothes fit, but the idea of making a big shift feels overwhelming—or even pointless. You may feel like change works for others but not for you. This is where a victim mindset can creep in, where you believe that change isn’t realistic for you because of your circumstances, whether it’s your age, your metabolism, or even your schedule.

You might find yourself saying things like, “I’ve tried every diet, and nothing works,” or “My life is just too busy to focus on myself.” You’re focused on external factors and feel like the challenges are beyond your control. You might also avoid conversations about health and wellness, preferring to stay in your comfort zone, even if that comfort zone isn’t serving you anymore.

How to Move Forward: Start with gentle awareness. Recognize that just because something feels impossible right now doesn’t mean it always will. Begin to notice the impact of your habits on your well-being—are you constantly fatigued? Experiencing brain fog after meals? These are subtle signs that your body is asking for something different. This stage isn’t about leaping into action; it’s about simply acknowledging that maybe, just maybe, things could be better.

Stage 2: Contemplation – “I Know I Need to Change, But…”

Now, you’re starting to think, “Maybe I should make some changes.” You’re aware that things like overeating carbs, skipping meals, or neglecting self-care aren’t helping, but taking action still feels daunting. You know deep down that something has to shift, but the thought of committing to a new routine feels overwhelming.

This stage often shows up as paralysis by analysis. You start researching different diets, exercise programs, and wellness routines but get stuck in a loop of indecision. You might even start questioning, “What if I fail again?” The fear of failure or the enormity of the task ahead can keep you from taking the first step.

How to Move Forward: Contemplation is all about gathering information and weighing your options. Take small, manageable steps toward change. Ask yourself, “What’s one thing I could do differently that wouldn’t feel too overwhelming?” Maybe it’s swapping out sugary snacks for a healthier option or simply starting your day with a glass of water. Start thinking about how small shifts can add up over time. Remember, it’s not about perfection—it’s about progress.

Stage 3: Preparation – “I’m Getting Ready to Make Moves.”

You’re getting close. You’ve done your research, maybe found a few meal ideas, or explored ways to fit in movement. You’re not just thinking about change—you’re planning it. You might have bought some new groceries or carved out time in your calendar for a morning walk. You’ve mentally committed to making changes, but there’s still a bit of hesitation. That inner voice might whisper, “Can I really do this?”

This stage often shows up as planning without action. You’ve set your intentions, made lists, maybe even bought new workout gear, but you haven’t quite taken the leap into full action. You’re standing on the edge of change, but there’s still a part of you that’s unsure.

How to Move Forward: Here’s the key: Start small. Choose one simple habit—something that takes little effort or time—and commit to it. For example, if you want to start walking daily, commit to putting your shoes on and walking outside. You can come right back in if you want, but the simple action of putting your shoes on every day becomes your cue for success. Small actions build momentum, and soon, these changes gain momentum will become a natural part of your routine.

Stage 4: Action – “I’m Doing the Thing.”

Now, you’re in it. You’ve started making changes—maybe you’re eating fewer carbs, prioritizing breakfast, or fitting in more self-care. You’re actively making choices that support your goals. This stage is exciting because you can feel the difference in your body, energy levels, or mindset. However, this is also where the challenges come in. Real-life stressors can throw you off track, and maintaining consistency can feel harder than expected.

This stage often shows up as initial success followed by challenges. You might start strong, but then life happens—a stressful week at work, family obligations, or social events—and suddenly, sticking to your plan feels difficult. You might find yourself slipping back into old habits, questioning whether you can keep it up long-term.

How to Move Forward: Focus on consistency over perfection. Celebrate every small win—even if that means choosing a healthier snack or sticking to your intermittent fasting window. The goal is to keep showing up, even when it’s tough. Research shows that habits become easier over time as your brain rewires itself to support new behaviors​. And don’t beat yourself up if you slip—just get back on track. Progress is a journey, not a race.

Stage 5: Maintenance – “I’ve Got This.”

In the maintenance stage, your new habits are starting to feel more natural. You’ve been cutting back on carbs, making time for meals, and prioritizing yourself long enough that it’s become part of your routine. But here’s the tricky part: old habits can still creep back in, especially when life gets stressful.

This stage often shows up as complacency. You’ve made great progress, but you might start feeling like you’ve “got it all figured out,” which can lead to slipping back into old patterns. It’s easy to get comfortable and let your guard down, thinking the hard work is over. But long-term success requires ongoing effort.

How to Move Forward: Keep reinforcing those new habits. If you find yourself slipping, ask yourself why. Are you stressed, tired, or feeling overwhelmed? Identifying triggers can help you stay on track. Maintenance is about staying mindful of your progress and continuing to prioritize your well-being, even when things get tough. Keep setting small goals to maintain your motivation and focus.

Stage 6: Termination – “This Is Just Who I Am Now.”

You’ve reached the termination stage. Your new behaviors aren’t just habits—they’re a part of who you are. You no longer need to think about cutting back on carbs or making time for meals; it’s just what you do. This stage feels liberating because you’ve fully integrated these changes into your life, and you’re reaping the rewards—feeling more energized, healthy, and confident.

This stage shows up as automatic behavior. You’re no longer consciously thinking about your choices—they’re just part of your routine. You don’t have to plan for self-care or meal prep; it’s simply how you live your life now. This stage can feel incredibly empowering because you’ve proven to yourself that lasting change is possible.

How to Move Forward: Celebrate your success! Reflect on how far you’ve come and how these changes have impacted your life. It’s not just about weight loss or health improvements—it’s about reclaiming your power and taking control of your future. Even though you’ve reached this stage, it’s important to stay mindful and continue reinforcing these habits, especially during stressful times.